


Moonlight

by DangerRollins



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Memories, Smut, Valentine's Day, Valentine's Day Fluff, some characters tagged are just mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-11
Updated: 2018-02-11
Packaged: 2019-03-16 19:58:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13643397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DangerRollins/pseuds/DangerRollins
Summary: Valentine's Day for Rick and Negan is spent under the moonlight, telling stories they've already told, sharing their favorite memories with one another, laughing at things that aren't all that funny, and pretending that their world isn't about to face major turmoil.





	Moonlight

Rick looks amazing in the moonlight, and that's the first thing Negan ever noticed about him. When they were 18, they found each other somehow. Maybe it was mere coincidence, maybe it was fate. Their opinions tended to differ when they thought back on how it happened—What made it happen—But at the end of the day all they cared about was the fact that somehow, someway, it happened.

Their school was small as shit, less than a thousand students attending, and everybody knew everybody, at least that's how it seemed. King County was small, cramped, too fucking crowded, at least from an outsider's perspective. Negan had only been living there for a year and that year had been hell. Moving from Virgina to King County was the worst decision he'd ever made in his life, but he didn't have the money to move again so he was stuck facing the consequences of his stupid fucking actions.

He moved out of his house and away from his family as quickly as he could, hoping to leave them in the past and never run into them in the future. He spent months searching for a place to stay, somewhere cheap that even a high schooler could manage to afford, somewhere that wasn't Virginia. It took a long ass time and a shit ton of frustration, but he finally did it. He heard from a friend about a town called King County. It was over in Georgia, pretty fucking small, and not well known at all. He was desperate to get away from home, so he looked into the offer. There was a house there, a one bedroom little shit hole. It was deep in the woods, broken down, and looked more like a storage unit than a house, but he bought it. Not two nights later, he slipped out without saying any goodbyes, made the long drive on his bike, taking only a few items with him, and now, that's where he was. King County.

It was a miserable place to be. Every corner you turned there was someone you knew, and that wasn't good, especially for Negan who had a habit of making enemies instead of friends. It was a boring fucking place most times, but when it wasn't, you wished it was. The only crimes every committed in the small town were always extreme. Murder, attempted murder, things along the lines of that.

Negan had only made one friend the entire year he was there. A girl by the name of Sasha, a real hardass, in Negan's opinion. She was filled with sarcasm and bossiness and sass, but she, like Negan, held a certain charisma. Something that made her hard to hate.

Negan's attitude and crude ways didn't scare her off, and after a few months of trying and failing to get rid of her, he gave up. If she wanted to stick around then fine, she could. Is not like she was the worst company anyways.

She was the one who got him there.

It was senior year, the weeks had been winding down quickly and graduation had been quickly approaching. It was the Sunday before, and Sasha had demanded that he come to the Senior campout. No amount of arguing could persuade her to let him skip it, and she dragged him there against his will.

He found himself thanking god for that a lot lately.

He was having a miserable time, all by himself as she hung out with all of her friends. She tried to get him to socialize but he wouldn't, and eventually, she gave up. He was fine with that. She'd meant well, but they both knew that he should've just stayed at the house. What was the point of trying to make friends now anyway? They'd all be graduating soon, going their separate ways. Most of these people would be moving away soon anyways unless they were keen on going to the tiny community college that King County had to offer.

He sulked all night basically, alone and annoyed, but what was new?

Until suddenly, a boy with large, blue eyes was in front of him, staring down at him as he laid on his back glaring up at the sky. Negan's eyes had widened immediately upon seeing the boy, not just because he was scared out of his daze, but also because he was convinced he'd never seen anything so beautiful before.

Rick, the boy had introduced himself as. His name rolled off of Negan's tongue just right, and he loved that. Rick was a beautiful fucking boy, the intense blue surrounding him, provided by the night sky, and the mist that also wrapped itself around him making him look angelic. Negan kept having to pinch himself as he spoke to the boy, afraid he was god damn dreaming.

Rick had come over to introduce himself, seeing that Negan looked fucking miserable. He was friendly, polite, didn't seem to be judging Negan like everyone else he'd spoken to did, and he seemed like an interesting guy but Negan couldn't focus on what he was saying. He was too busy trying to figure out how he'd never seen Rick around in school or in town. He saw the ugly faces of everyone else all the time no matter how much he didn't want to, so why had he never seen Rick?

Negan could tell by the way the boy spoke that he'd been living here his whole life. The usually agitating sound of the strong, southern drawl gave him right away. He spoke just like everyone else from this shit town, except he made it attractive.

That's where it's started. On that field, camping out during their last weekend of being seniors.

When Negan got over the initial shock of how god damn gorgeous Rick was, he was able to hold an amazing conversation with him. He was still crude, still loud, still cocky and still Negan, but Rick was more charmed by it than he was offended, and Negan took that as a good sign.

Their conversation was so damn good that he managed to get Rick's number. A month later, they were fucking like bunnies up until Rick moved away to go off to college.

They both agreed that keeping in contact with each other wasn't gonna happen. Neither Rick nor Negan had any intentions of having a long distance relationship, and friends were a rare phenomenon with Negan. He didn't feel the need to have them, and honestly, Rick already had too many. They said their goodbyes, not all that upset about it, and that was the end of that...

Until Rick came back to King County, twelve years later.

Negan had left almost right after Rick, making his way to Vegas and then to Arizona and then Texas. He'd become a teacher, but before he was that, he was a traveler. One day, when he just couldn't figure out where to go next, an itch in his spine and a sharp pain in his gut somehow made him think about King County. The town he hated so god damn much and had never planned to go back to again.

Yet, he did.

He bought another house there, this one at least a little better than his old one, and even though it was still a little too cramped for his style, this time around it was almost kind of peaceful.

He'd been there for two and a half months before he and Rick met up again. Things were different now. Rick had a wife and a kid, Negan had met a girl that he was interested in, and they were nothing more than friends for the longest time.

It was twelve years later when they finally decided that maybe they should try the whole dating thing out.

Lori had died, Lucille, the girl Negan had fallen in love with, had died, Negan and Rick's friendship had been tested time after time and they found that the only thing that made the world bearable anymore was each other. They loved each other, that was the only thing that stayed constant throughout their years together.

They got married a year after officially entering their relationship, and they'd been having the time of their lives ever since. Sure, they fought. Some days being in the same room with one another was just plain unbearable, but most days were amazing. Most days they couldn't stay away from one another to save their souls. Some days they needed each other more than anything.

"I want you to tell me again." Rick smiled. "Say them again, Negan. I know you remember them, you can deny it all you want but I know you remember."

"Repeating my wedding vows is just...Rick, I can't! That's like—It's cringey!"

"It's romantic." Rick rolled his eyes.

Negan sighed. Sitting here under the moonlight with Rick once again, the first time they'd gotten to enjoy the alone time out under the stars in years, Rick looking just as amazing now as he'd looked the first night Negan had met him, Negan couldn't deny Rick what he wanted. No matter how weird, how embarrassing and how cringey it was, Negan would say his vows again if that was what Rick wanted.

"I didn't know what living was until I met you. I know it's corny, I know it sounds cliche, but it's true. My whole life has been a hell storm of unfortunate events. I've never been happy. My childhood wasn't a childhood, it was an atrocious tragedy. I've had only two real friends in my entire life, and one of those is you. My family aren't really my family they're just the people I was unlucky enough to get stuck with for a short while in my life. You...You're one of the only good things I have going for me. I'm eternally grateful to you for being something that I can call my own. I'm thankful that you've been so patient with me, so willing to be there for me when I needed you most, and for treating me like no others ever bothered to treat me; Like a human. I've always been the black sheep, and hell, I know that's my fault for the most part, but still. You've welcomed me into your life, into your son and daughter's lives, into your family. You've given me the chance to observe what a real family is like and to actually be apart of that. You've allowed me to see the greater good, you've allowed me to...Live. That's all I've ever wanted to do, and I searched for years...To find a way to feel alive and no matter what I did I just...Couldn't. And then you gave me a chance and suddenly..."

Negan sighed. Somehow, he still remembered every single word he'd said to Rick on that beautiful day when they finally got married. He didn't even have to think about it, the words were just flowing out his mouth, and he wondered how that was possible.

"Suddenly I understood what it was like to actually look forward to waking up the next morning. What it was like to legitimately **want** to have the opportunity to wake up the next morning. Words can't describe how thankful I am that I met you. I can't pay you back for all you've done for me, but I will try my damndest to by being the best husband I can be. By treating you like royalty every chance I get. By loving you unconditionally for all eternity."

"It's still beautiful," Rick mumbled.

"Not as beautiful as you," Negan smirked. Rick rolled his eyes as his eyes drifted up to stare at the moon once again. "You know what I'd love to see again?"

"What?" Negan whispered.

"The look on your face when you thought Judith was gonna fall off the slide at the playground." Rick grinned. Negan had nearly had a heart attack when he thought she was going to fall over the edge of the slide. Rick himself had been worried, but not nearly as worried as Negan was, apparently. Negan had sprinted over to her with hopes of catching her before she fell, but she didn't. She'd just giggled at him and then slid down, clapping excitedly before running to hug Rick.

Rick hadn't been able to hold in his laughter then and he wasn't able to now.

"I was a concerned parent, Rick, I'm glad you think that's funny." Negan huffed. "I wouldn't be laughing if I was you. You nearly broke your neck when you thought Carl was falling off the trampoline--"

"We agreed to never talk about that again!" Rick interrupted quickly. Carl had somehow managed to convince him to jump on the new trampoline he'd saved up to buy. Carl had always wanted one and Rick had told him that if he saved his own money, he could get one. So, he did.

He'd been enjoying it for a few weeks before he finally asked Rick to jump on it with him. It got boring playing out there by himself, and his friends couldn't always be there with him, so he needed to ask someone. Judith was too small and the trampoline didn't have a net so she wasn't allowed on it, and Negan complained about his knee problems too much for Carl to even bother asking him.

Rick hadn't wanted to at first, but he decided after a while that he might as well. His sixteen-year-old son was asking him to jump on his trampoline with him. That didn't happen every day; he thought it was a miracle that Carl wanted to spend some time with him, so he took the boy up on his offer.

They'd been having a great time too, but Carl had jumped a little too close to the edge and begun losing his balance. Rick didn't want him to fall, knowing the ground wasn't exactly the softest place for him to land. The grass wasn't high and wouldn't cushion the fall at all.

He'd lunged forward to catch Carl, but the boy had already steadied himself. Rick had moved too quickly and he ended up throwing his own self off the trampoline. Thankfully, he hadn't broken anything, but it still hurt like a bitch.

"I miss when we used to go to your brother's house and have those huge Sunday dinners." Negan chuckled. "I hated them at the time because you always made us dress up like we were going to church or something, but looking back on it, it was great. Jeff really knew how to make some Broccoli casserole." 

"Yeah, I miss those too. I'd kill for some of his potato salad." Rick groaned, rubbing his stomach. "It's sad to say, but I'm kind of glad he moved away. We get along a lot better now."

Negan snorted and nodded his head. Rick and his brother had managed to pick a fight with each other damn near every time they saw each other. They loved one another, but they really knew how to get under each other's skin.

"What's been your favorite..." Negan drifted off, a devilish smile appearing on his face. Rick glanced at him when he noticed he'd stopped talking and shook his head. "What? It's just a question!" Negan demanded.

"You expect me to choose my favorite?" Rick raised a brow.

"I know they were all good, but--"

"Shut up." Rick laughed. "...The one in the grocery store."

"The grocery store? That was like the quickest fuck we've ever had--"

"Yeah, but it was hot. I mean, come on, nobody bangs in a grocery store. It's such a...Not sexy place. And we managed to make it sexy. It was cool."

"I guess...But we had sex on a boat once." Negan snickered.

"That was most certainly **not** my favorite. I was terrified and turned on at the same time and it was...Too nerve-wracking."

"My favorite was when you screwed me in the bed of your dad's truck." Negan smirked. "I still think he knows what we got up to back there."

"You know, Negan, we've had some pretty good sex over the years, but I'd love to have a new favorite." Rick wiggled his brows as he turned to lay on his stomach. He pushed Negan back a little, so that his weight rested on his elbows, and then traced his fingers along Negan's side slowly. "Why don't we give it a go? Right here, right now."

"Rick I don't know—"

"I do. I know." Rick whined softly. "Please?"

And how could Negan say no to Rick when he was like this? Lips jutted out in a playful pout, eyes all wide and blue as ever, skin looking tauntingly smooth and begging to be touched. Even a blind man wouldn't be able to turn down Rick, and Negan was most certainly **not** blind.

"Well," He drawled, scratching his bearded chin lazily. "My body isn't going to undress its self."

Rick let out a quiet chuckle before shaking his head and fumbling with Negan's belt eagerly. Negan allowed himself to lay all the way back, placing his arms under his head as he glanced up at the sky once again before looking at Rick, who still looked as incredible as he did ten seconds ago, and yet, it was still surprising. How could an actual human be so attractive?

"I've got a condom in my back pocket."

"We don't need it." Rick grinned. Negan lifted his hips up so that Rick could get his pants and underwear off of him. "I was kind of hoping you'd feel me up a bit while you were searching for it..." Negan wiggled his brows. Rick rolled his eyes but gave Negan's butt a playful pinch a soft squeeze before he moved to get the man's pants off from around his ankles.

"I know we're skipping the foreplay tonight, but you pinching my nipples like that won't be frowned upon, just in case you happen to find the time to--"

"Shut up, Negan." Rick laughed.

He removed his own pants and then threw his shirt off to the side before leaning down to give Negan a sloppy kiss. Negan's smirk had been erased as he focused on grinding his dick against Rick's.

The kiss was heated, Negan's hand tugging at the curls that rested at the nape of Rick's neck, Rick's hands roaming up and down Negan's stomach and occasionally brushing over their already erect cocks, their tongues battling as they mindlessly grinded against one another, letting out sharp breaths, harsh groans, and soft whimpers.

Negan gently pushed Rick off of him after a few minutes. Rick didn't ask any questions or make any complaints as he turned around to get on all fours, and Negan's eyes fluttered shut. Another low groan escaped from the back of his throat as he opened his eyes again. Rick looked so fucking good like this, his ass poking out, eagerly awaiting Negan's dick.

"I need you." Rick whined, his voice cracking before he could complete his finish. Negan decided not to be difficult and make him beg. All he wanted right now was to fuck the younger man into the ground.

Negan wordlessly moved forward, licking his hand and stroking his cock a few times, though he knew Rick was already prepared to take him. He closed his eyes again as he pushed himself into Rick, listening as the man let a small gasp escape his mouth.

Negan's thrusts were slow at first, painstakingly slow, and they felt so good but they just weren't enough. Rick whined as he tried to move his hips back to meet with Negan's shallow thrusts, but Negan was one step ahead of him, already having gripped his hips tightly, restraining him.

Negan wanted to quicken his pace, but he didn't. He wanted to make the moment last for as long as possible, and he and Rick were already fairly close to their release, partially because of the fact that it'd been a while since they'd had sex. Rick continued to whine but he didn't say anything, understanding how Negan felt.

Negan leaned forward, his body draping over Rick's as he allowed his forehead to rest against the paler man's back. Rick's skin was silky smooth, and warm despite the fact that it was relatively cool out. Negan allowed one of his hands to travel from Rick's hip and up his side before he decided to bring it down again, stroking Rick.

"N-Negan." Rick moaned. "Fuck, Negan."

"I know, honey." Negan cooed. He couldn't resist anymore, his hips began moving at a quicker pace almost against his will. Rick felt so fucking good, and he sounded good and he looked good and he smelt good and...And Rick was just **so good.**

"I love you so much." Negan gritted out as he leaned back again. He put all his focus on his quick and steady thrusts, watching as his cock slid in and out of Rick repeatedly. The obscene sounds filling the once calm air and the delicious smell of amazing sex sent him over the edge before he knew it.

He didn't slow his thrusts, though they were a lot sloppier. He was determined to send Rick over the edge as well.

It didn't take long. A few more strokes and he was coming undone, his back arching and forehead dropping down onto the grass.

Negan silently pulled out of him and moved to his side, lying down in the soft grass and allowing Rick to do the same. When Rick's head was comfortably tucked underneath his chin, he closed his eyes.

They didn't say anything for a while, just enjoying the peaceful silence as they tried to catch their breath, but Rick sighed as he felt Negan's chest shaking. "Negan--"

"Why do you have to leave me, Rick? Why do you have to go?"

"I just do."

"The world isn't gonna be shit without you. I haven't met anybody like you yet. Not in all my years. There's only one you, Rick."

"There is."

"I'm not gonna make it without you."

"You will."

"We both know I won't. The time I have left is just as limited as yours. When you...When you go, I won't be here much longer."

"You will be because I need you to be. Somebody has to take care of Carl and Judith—"

"Carl is almost twenty and he can take care of Judith. He does a good job of it."

"He does...Somebody has to take care of him, though. He can take care of himself; he's proven that again and again. He's been a man since he was a just a kid. That doesn't mean he should **have** to take care of himself. He's gonna need you."

"Rick—"

"You thought the world was ending when Lucille died. You beat yourself up about it, you went insane. But you brought yourself back and you realized that the world didn't stop spinning just because she wasn't in it anymore. You moved on. You'll do that again."

"I didn't bring myself back, **you** brought me back, that's the difference. This time, I won't have a Rick hanging around making sure I'm alright. This time I won't have anyone to be in love with, who'll show me that shit isn't all that shitty sometimes."

"You don't have to believe it, but you have to know. You **did** bring yourself back. Maybe I helped a little, but you can't help anyone who doesn't wanna be helped. If you hadn't made the effort to get better, to bring yourself back to life, you wouldn't be here right now. But you did."

"I'm convinced this is just you fucking with me. Just you punishing me for being a dick all the time. Just you giving me the biggest 'fuck you' of all time. This is petty, you know."

Rick chuckled. "Yeah, it is."

"Fucking heart problems of all things? You were healthy as a horse a year ago."

"That was a year ago." Rick shrugged. "Besides, you know that's not true. I was never healthy, I just thought I was."

"I'm so pissed off, I just...Why does everything always have to be so misleading? Why'd the universe paint you as a perfect fucking picture when you're not?"

"I'm glad this is how it's happening, Negan." Rick sighed. "I don't even wish we'd known sooner. Maybe I would've been able to get help, to get a transplant, save my life, but maybe I wouldn't have. Maybe it would've ended the exact same way it is now, only I would've spent all my time trying to fix something I couldn't. Trying to make things change, make it turn out differently. Instead, I didn't know. I didn't know I was gonna die so soon, I didn't realize there was a problem with my heart, and I spent my time actually living. With you. I don't regret that."

Negan sighed and put his hand over his eyes. He could feel insanity creeping up on him already. The thought of Rick no longer existing...The thought of seeing him with no life left in him, in a coffin...The thought of him no longer being there...

He couldn't wrap his head around it. How could he ever accept this? How could he ever fucking live with this?

"We don't know for sure when it'll happen. We just know that it will. Negan, tonight could be our last night together. It's Valentine's Day. We can enjoy it. We can keep pretending everything's okay tonight because tomorrow it may not be."

"You're right." Negan sighed heavily. He and Rick needed to enjoy the rest of their night.

What Negan didn't know was that Rick really **was** right.

That night had been their last one together.

**Author's Note:**

> V-Day angst, anyone?
> 
> WHYYYY IN THE HELLLLL AM I LIKE THISSSSSSSSS MY BABY NEGAN DOES NOT DESERVE THIS FUCKING SHIT BUT YALL KNOW I HAD TO DO IT TO HIM
> 
> Another summary for this: Rick has a hidden heart disease and now it's too late.


End file.
